Years Dry On Their Own

Well, here it is, the last day of 2007. I am at my office job, so the highlight of my nite other than composing this year-end letter for you will be at 3AM when I will listen online to Rodney Bingenheimer live from LA (on KROQ, a testosterone-heavy rock station any other time of day). Google Rodney. He's been around since the mid-sixties, friend to the stars, entree-prenoor supremo (his "English Disco" back in the early 70's was a home-away-from-home to touring brit acts like Zeppelin and Bowie). There's an interesting, sometimes sad documentary about him called "The Mayor Of Sunset Strip". He's a national treasure.

So what happened this year? who cares, it's all in the past! What's happening NOW? THAT'S the question. And what WILL be happening in the future? That, my dear friends is up to YOU. MAKE SOMETHING HAPPEN!!! Or just cool out.

Ever drink bourbon at a holiday party? I did, last night. You should try it. Forget stupid beer. Wine is equally stupid. Sorry, cork sniffers. Go crawl up the remainder of your ass. What bouquet! Bourbon can be enjoyed on the rocks, mixed with soda (yecchh) or even cola if you are self-conscious. And especially by the SHOT. Forget gin, vodka, any other clear liquor, those are not made for shot drinking. And tequila just tastes plain horrible. Well. what about Schnapps, I hear you ask? Whaddaya, crazy? Gee whiz, Potsie, what if your mom finds out? She won't, if you remember to add water to the bottle. And to hell with Jager, that's for people who drive hummers and have miniscule cocks. Bourbon does it for REAL. And I'm a-gonna do it again on New Years Eve.

So what should we do this year? Well, whatever you do, don't forget to vote this year and DON'T BE STUPID ABOUT IT. Things are too repressive, we need change. At least for the juke box. If you wanna waste votes, do it on American Idol or something. Also, let's vow not to make anymore useless people into big celebrities. We've gone too far & now it seems normal to have bags of rocks as role models. In fact, let's vow not to have ANY MORE big celebrities. We can do it, if we all join forces & make a pact. If we can tear ourselves away from Carrie Ann & Bruno: Dance Wars, that is.

And please, no more dogs-in-a-handbag. If you must cart that little rat around like an accessory, put it in a picnic basket, Dorothy.

I'd like to leave on a positive note. I believe people are basically good at heart. I believe people will help those in need when the chips are down. For all my complaining, there's no where I'd rather be than in the good ol' U. S. of A.

But maybe everyone else could relocate.