In the past two weeks I must've seen two dozen Lifetime made-for-TV xmas movies. Why do I watch them? Don't ask. Everything else is in reruns because of the writers' strike. But I gotta tell ya, I have never seen such bad acting or such pitiful scripts since (fill in the name of any box office smash of the last five years).
So sit back and relax while I freestyle bitch about Xmas for awhile...
- The local radio station plays Xmas music 24 hours a day, and has been doing so since I believe November 1. They play the same dozen songs over & over. Wait, I already complained about this. See, the writers' strike has EVERYTHING in reruns! But in a perfect world, we'd be hearing Roy Wood's "I Wish It Could Be Xmas Everyday" and Slade's "Merry Xmas Everybody". Those limeys really knew how to deck the halls back in the early 70s, boy!
- Target's seasonal promos feature Jim Noir's "My Patch" from his "Tower Of Love" lp, which was never a Xmas song, but good ol' Target, they just changed the words and made it one! Now if only someone would do that with Howlin' Wolf's "I Asked For Water (she brought me gasoline)"...
- LED lights - 21st century technology & they can't make white ones?
- Cashmere: this year's IOU sweatshirt! Or maybe this year's Old Navy Fleece!
- Does the verizon network geek guy get less pay because he no longer has lines?
- Those pseudo-retro claymation-style holiday commercials on Food Network will thankfully be gone in a week. However, the hosts will retain their Clydesdale feet!
- Speaking of commercials, I get a perverse pleasure from the McCormick spice one, where the doorbell rings & the guy says "hey, my folks are here!" And in the kitchen the wife mutters under her breath, "F#@k!"
Well, that's all I can think of for now. Soon, I'll be posting my best-of & worst-of lists for 2007. That'll be lopsided for sure!
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