Thursday, August 28, 2008

La Bamba!

First off, let me say I still endorse Alfred E. Newman for president.

Predictably all the forward-thinking lefty celebs are supporting Borat - no wait, that's BARAK. Er, that's not right, either. It's BARACK. BARACK OBAMA. Yeah, that's it. Y'know if I were him, I'd plead with all them beautiful people to stay away in droves. F'rinstance there's these stupid rock bands putting on concerts in Denver during the convention, thinking they're helping their man get over. Yeah. Rage Against The Machine, pseudo-radical has-beens who mix tuneless grunge with political rhetoric, have reformed because they think America needs them now more than ever, and they're Denver-bound to prove it. Joining the act in Mile-Highville is one of the elders, or elderly, Wayne Kramer. He was - IS - famous for being 1st chair guitarist in MC5, another group (in)famous for it's (pseudo)political leanings - that is until they realized - too late of course - it was an obstacle to their shot at *pop*stardom. Fact is, were it not for their Mao- and Panther-inspired manager they would've been a mere footnote in the cesspool of anonymous 60s rock bands instead of gladly copping to the moniker "forefathers of punk".

A lot of words about not much. As usual.

McCain. Poor guy. McLame. He picks one song for his campaign, and how stupid is he, because it's "Running On Empty" by well-known lefty Jackson Browne. Does anyone else NOT know Browne is a dem-supporter? Hey, McCain has his supporters, too. Heidi Montag. Angie Harmon. Craig T. Nelson.

It's the same every four years. That's why I think celebs and musicians should be banned from publicly supporting politicians. Cuz then we get assholes like REM, or Bono, who's not even American, voicing their choice, and dispensing with their head-up-their-arse wisdom. Who cares what they think about politics? They're much too far removed from reality to know what's happening on the street. Maybe they should use their time more wisely and work on their craft, cuz their records sure do suck. And their support, in my opinion, hurts their guy. Look, we all know Hollywood & the rock world are gonna go Dem. So why bother to go all public with it? The publicity? Yeah, probably. It looks good on the resume.

At this point nothing anyone does is going to change anything about how America is going to vote. Either way. Not Biden. Not Hillary's "support" (c'mon - you believed that speech?). Not Rage or Michael Stipe. It would take a combination of Bill Clinton's cigar, John Edwards' booty call, Kwame Kilpatrick's bullshit and Charles Manson's bloodbath to NOT put LaBamba (I dig that one) in the White House.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Biden Wants Band On The Run for Campaign Song

Geez. What a weekend. Perfect weather, except I had to spend most of my saturday afternoon sleeping because I worked friday night. Everything was going fine until Sunday when I got the one-two punch of stupidity. First, I see the headlines screaming that Joe Biden has been picked for Vice-Principal. Then horror of horrors I see the Sports Illustrated cover with Pumpkin seeds-teeth in a halter top no self respecting hooker would wear. And I have decided this has to be the ugliest boy on the planet.

Truth be told, I don't know a lot about Joe Biden, but I will check him out. Not that it will alter my decision in the voting booth. I mean, come on. I don't know that Biden was a stupid choice. I just wanted someone more ... something.

But that's my opinion.

And you're welcome to it.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008


Hey everybody! Lookit over on the right side of your screen! I've added a list of blogs & websites that you HAVE to check out! They're in alpha order, so there's no favoritism exhibited. Take a moment and look for yourself.

BUT I must tell you if you're looking for good sounds on the web, (you knew I'd push this one extra hard) you GOTTA go to the WFMU site. You can dig archive shows, listen live and don't forget to visit their home page because they are truly orbiting elsewhere. And their blog is wildly entertaining, there are so many things happening. Shows that get the GoogaMooga seal of approval are Dave The Spazz (thurs 8-11pm - this is my favorite show), Michael Shelley (sat 10am-1pm), Fool's Paradise (sat 1-3pm), Teenage Wasteland (sun 5-7pm), and Downtown Soulville (fri 7-8pm) but there are certainly many more esoteric shows to check out. I usually listen archive-style, since many shows are going down while I'm busy doing other meaningless things.

Also the RootsRockReggae site has NO Dancehall, NO Ragga, NO Reggaeton - strictly roots! And WWOZ - well, what can I say, it's from Nawlins! And XFM is London's best modern music source, very diverse. But remember, they're 6 hours ahead of us.

OK, enough commercials - see ya soon!

Monday, August 18, 2008

I Could Use A Genny Cream Ale Right About Now

Here I am, fresh from a weekend one could describe as a very sobering experience. I went to a baby shower - shut up - and I both arrived & left sober. Then I went to a party, and I left it sober - ??!!?? - How does that happen when you bring your own boatload of drinks? Well, I'll tell you how - because I left early when one of my crosstown passengers got the rockin' pneumonia and/or the boogie woogie flu. I won't say who, but he got my daughter pregnant (you know who you are). Then after all that I broke my toe. It's the one that if you could give the finger with your foot, that's the toe you'd use. Yesterday it was black, today it's purple. Tomorrow, probably green & yellow, if this is America.

Interesting fact: over the weekend I found out hundreds of people read this blog, but they're not commenting because they're holding the laptop with one hand & wiping with the other. True story. (Fishsticks: holla back)

Another interesting thing I discovered: you can win a shitload of olympic medals even when your mouth looks like a bunch of pumpkin seeds in a squeezy change purse. Somebody better call 1-800-dentist, and by someone I mean you Phelpsie!

So I really don't have anything else to say right now, so I'll cut you all loose & as soon as I have something to say about nothing which apparently is how some of you like it, I'll post another tirade.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

All Hail The Queen

Today marks my first daughter's birthday. Presley died 3 days after she was born. He had to make way for her. The world couldn't continue to spin with both of them in it. So be it: Adios, loser!

When she was little, she was bald & beautiful. Then her hair grew in, and she continued to be beautiful. I never talked to her with that "eechi-weechi-koochi-koo" shit, and maybe that's why she never needed a diction or elocution coach.
At different stages in her life she did things I didn't understand, and while it would occasionally mess my head up, it was a valid part of life & that's kinda the way it should be. If you can read through this statement, kids should discard everything their parents do & parents should in turn hate whatever their kids embrace. Like I said, see through the cultural meaning of that statement.
There were more differences between my prior generation & me than hers & mine. Imagine life with no rock & roll or tv; sex & drugs & gay life were taboo & kept hidden in the dark crevices of life; no one paid attention to women unless they were stripping; no shopping on Sunday; no meat on Friday; no VIP sections at clubs. And all phones had cords, although phone booths apparently were a youth culture oasis.
When she was born I was in the throws of nascent Punk culture. I mean, I had a job & all that, but if stuff wasn't Punk-oriented, I didn't want to know. 1977 was year zero for Punk. I had a friend cut my hair short - SHORT - and she was dumb-founded. "You don't want it styled?" No, just CHOP THE SHIT OFF! And I remember The Clash playing on the stereo - repeatedly, since at the time all they had was one UK single. I tossed all my flairs and bell bottoms. It wasn't easy finding any other kindsa pants. But you could get straight leg jeans at Kmart, for the farmers, I guess. I actively sought out all Punk music. No one knew about any of it. Some things never change. I bought my first Punk records by mail order from New York. They arrived addressed to "occupant" - how blank-generation!

I wondered what would happen after I had kids. You certainly go through changes; you have to think differently about some things, but I was still the same person I was in most ways. And to this day, I still am. I remember back when I was single, taking my niece to the Thanksgiving Day parade, and getting her back a bit later than expected. My sister & brother-in-law were furious. They always thought I was an irresponsible hippie. "Wait till you have kids", my brother-in-law said as I walked out of their house. "not like you, motherf#%ker", I remember thinking. And I never was.
Somewhere there exists a cassette tape of me teaching my daughter how to say "rastafar-i" and "are we not men? we are devo!" She was maybe two.
So now my daughter is older than I was when she was born. And despite creaking bones and such, I'd like to think I'm the same as I was back then. I wish she could've experienced some things I did that don't exist anymore. Just like my mother might've, I guess. It's a tough world nowadays, mostly because of money and jobs. You gotta be strong. And that's certainly what my daughter is.
After all, she brought about the death of Elvis.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Bad Mutha...

Here's why Chef is dead: he got all shirty about South Park. It put food on his table. And while I usually believe in biting the hand that feeds you, I gotta believe he HAD to have fun doing what he was doing. Nothing was to be taken seriously, and he had to be hip enough to know that. I think he was looking for an out, so he could revive his "Black (old man) Moses" persona. Or maybe reprise his role as Truck Turner.

AND THEN ... or actually EARLIER...

Bernie Mac, who I think is kinda funny even though he talks like he has a mouth fulla bar-b-q alla the time (he's whitey-approved) gets sick & up and dies.

Ike & Mac are co-starring with Jules from Pulp Fiction in an upcoming movie - two corpses, the negro "Dark Knight"?


Thursday, August 7, 2008

Yeah, I know, two posts in one day. Sorry, I couldn't help it. I mean, here's Deborah Harry. 60-year-old Deborah Harry. Former Playboy bunny "watch me dip" Deborah Harry. Mature Deborah Harry. Or so I thought. Grandma, HELP!


This magazine should be called "WTF" !! Here's Kate Hudson looking like a Patrick Nagel drawing, that is, like a Duran Duran lp cover, that is, like a cheap piece of "art" in a furniture store.

That's all, just wanted to show you this ridiculous thing.