WAIL !!

First off, I think I messed up the connection between the photos I used on this page & my PC. I guess I over-deleted files, but I thought when I uploaded to the web they were out there. To quote Brian Wilson, Guess I'm Dumb.

Let's move on.

'Member when I told you about Frantic Ernie? Faithful reader Fat & Sassy sent me a link to an aircheck of Ernie D's show back in 1958. What's an aircheck, you ask? Well I'll tell you. Right now. In radio biz, tapes are made of an hour or 30 minutes or whatever of certain radio shows to see what the broadcast sounds like, to check for technical things or more often to review in much the same way an athlete reviews tapes of games. So here's 9 minutes of Frantic Ernie's show, back when he was doing shows both on WJLB Detroit and WBBC Flint. (Flint?!?)

http://rockradioscrapbook.ca/erniedurham.ram

Did you hear the "great googa mooga shooga wooga" towards the end? Yep, that's where I got it from! Yeah, I know, he sounds kinda tentative at times, but the world moved a bit slower back then.

OK, now here's another real gem: an aircheck of Alan Freed from 1955 in New York! Yes, Alan Freed! 1955! New York! Can't get much rock'n'roll than that! And in 1955, it had been just a year since Elvis first set foot in a studio. Think of last year. Looking back on things, that's not too far back. So things were still reall new. None of this kinda stuff existed a year earlier.

http://rockradioscrapbook.ca/freed-mar55.ram

I hope these links work.

It's too bad radio doesn't have this kind of personality nowadays. You can find it in isolated instances. I keep tellin' ya, go on the web to WFMU.ORG and check out their shows, either live or archived. Dave The Spazz (my favorite), Teenage Wasteland, Fool's Paradise, Downtown Soulville, Gaylord Fields, Bob Brainen, Three Chord Monte, man there's a lot of stuff there to check out. And you should.

Hope you dig the airchecks. It's been a real pleasure, treasure.

If You Had An Ass It Would Bite You In It

A number of years ago, Elvis Costello got in a cab in London or thereabouts and instructed the driver, "Take me to Chelsea". To which, the driver replied, "Ha Bloody Ha".

That's all I can say. I think you know what I mean.

Forecast: continued cold.

It's January! What do you expect?

Poor Heath Ledger. He was in Brokeback Mountain, but the one everyone remembers is Jake Gillsomething. He's in the Dylan sorta-biopic I'm Not There, but the one everyone will remember is Cate Blanchett, to be sure. And he just finished filming his role as Jack Nicholson in the new Batman. That's one hell of a way to get someone to care about those movies anymore. Always a bridesmaid.

Well, at least he has a candy bar named after him! And an accounting implement!

In all seriousness, though, don't ever take drugs naked. Even Amy Winehouse knows that (it's the blogger's law to mention her at least once per post until she hops the fence. Gawd, can you imagine seeing her naked? It would be like one of those bendy dolls, but with troll hair.) Because every item I saw about Heath Ledger mentioned how he was found naked in bed, dead of an overdose. He can't go back & throw on his drawers to change things.

Something else I didn't know about him: he started a record company with indie fave Ben Harper called Masses Music. The first signed act was some teenage girl from Australia, Grace Woodroofe, but that's all I know.

So while I didn't plan for this to be an obit, I had nothing else to write about. Maybe I should just stop right here -------------> .

I Rock; Therefore, I Ran

OK, what shall I write about today? I'm tired of being on Amy Winehouse watch, although The Sun has video of her smoking crack.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showbiz/bizarre/article710911.ece

She needs Dr. Phil!

It's been very cold. I have to wear slippers at home, because even with socks on my feet I still suffer the chills of January on my kitchen floor.

Anyway, what do you care?

Yes, it's Wintertime, and everyone I know is miserable. Everyone, I guess, except Amy. Maybe she is, too, but is just too out of it to realize it. Or to care.

Maybe that's the answer: ecstasy, cocaine, crack. OK, I'm ready for a trip to the hardware store!

Today I spoke to a guy at work who spent the past year in Iraq. I asked him if his opinion of the government changed since he'd been there & done that. He said "you know, you only see ten percent of what goes on there. There's a lot of good things going on there." I asked him if he thought we should've been there in the first place. I don't remember his exact words, but he apparently is going to vote for George Bush a third time. What can I say, this guy's teeth were all f'd up and his pants were too short. And on Dr King's day!

He had been all over Europe - he's in the reserves, and I guess I'll reserve my opinion of their dental plan for another time. His take on Paris was "filthy", and not because of the people, directly. He said it pretty much stems from the riots when kids just trashed things. I was certainly showing my age if not my knowledge of history when I interjected, "oh, back in '68?" and he replied, "no, last year." Wait, there were riots in Paris last year? No one told me! I thought the only unrest in Paris last year took place in her jail cell!

Time to wrap it up. But in closing, here's a tip for one of the coolest web sites I've stumbled across in recent months. It's called Square America, and it has a fantabulous collection of photos from who-knows-where.

http://squareamerica.com/

Now get out there and heat things up! C'est si bon!

Go Ape Everybody!

So, what's new? Glad the holidays are over, I can tell you that. I've-what's that? What picture? Who? I don't know what you're talking about. Are you sure? Wait, let me see...OH MY GOD! She actually went & got a job at an airplane factory?? I knew she had riveting experience, but I thought it was limited to the stage! Well, whatever it takes for the war effort, I guess!

OK, on to other things.

Just a word about Dave The Spazz from WFMU. On Jan 3 he played the Red Rose Tea song by the Red Rose Chimps. And it's all because of me. I knew of his fondness of primates & their comical place in our society (how 'bout those commercials: the riverdancing chimps, the partying office workers, need I say more), so I sent him this link

http://www.detroitkidshow.com/red_rose_tea.htm

which tells all about one of the coolest chimp spots ever, & provides info as to how you can buy the Red Rose Tea song on a compilation CD out of Pittsburgh.

Guess he bought it, cuz he played it, along with "Mule Milk" by Big Jay McNeely (I got that one after hearing it on his show - incredible is all I can say). If you know what's good for you, you'll go to the link above & check out the video, & then take it from there and by that I mean buy the CD. And go to WFMU.org & check out the archives of Dave The Spazz shows, or listen live on Thursdays from 8-11pm. Absolutely the best radio since David Wisdom's Nightlines show on CBC. Your life will change, believe you me.

Closing note: I've made jokes to various people about Rachel Ray's husband, not exactly remembering what his kink was, so I decided to look it up. It appears he likes to be spit on! And I can't think of anything clever to add to that, so if you can, put it in the comment section.

Oh wait, how about "I got your 30 minute meal right here: hooooocccck, ptui!"

At least I tried.

Kids For Sale

(note: the title was going to be Liza marries gay man - again!! but I thought that may be a bit obscure. google peter allen)

I can't take it anymore. Britney Spears. I'd like to hit her, baby, one more time. I realize that by blogging about her I am just as guilty as all the others when it comes to giving her undue press coverage (not that I am press, but you know what I mean). But y'know what? She did not invent the asshole celebrity persona (she did, however, perfect it). Idiot celebrities have been around for ages. It's just that media coverage is so vast nowadays, and info gets passed so quickly, we are kept in the know at all times. We can't hide from this shit! If Marilyn Monroe was around today, we'd probably know much more about her pill-taking escapades. And Judy Garland? Forget about it! And when Jerry Lee Lewis married his 14 year old 2nd cousin the video would be on YouTube! And Elvis had Priscilla living with him & his family in Germany when she was extremely underage! And her family agreed to that! It was like selling her! These are just a few tidbits I offer you.

What happened to the good old days when Michael Jackson used to carry Webster around like a pet chimp, then traded him in for a real pet chimp! Or when Alice Cooper wore Tammy Faye Baker makeup and wore a live snake boa! And what about bra burning and murdering b-movie starlets? (what - they still do that?)

These are desperate times. Divine eating dogshit is no longer an outrageous spectacle. Nowadays you have to drink the urine, too. And do it at the MTV Video Music Awards, of course.

That Was Then; This Isn't

2007 is over. Rodney on the Roq was boring (see previous post). New Years Eve was too low key, except for the ride home due to the crazy snow. I came home & went down into my dungeon/pad & put on my new xmas headphones & played me some "best of 2007" music. It went something like this, in no order that I can remember:

Sloan - Ill Placed Trust (never hear the end of it)
Von Sudenfed - Flooded (tromatic reflexxions)
Amy Winehouse - Valerie (Andy Cato's 'Pack Up & Dance' remix)
Of Montreal - Faberge Falls For Shuggie (hissing fauna)
The Long Blondes - Only Lovers Left Alive (someone to drive you home)
The White Stripes - Bone Broke (icky thump)
The Woggles - It's Not About What I Want (rock & roll backlash)
The Black Lips - Cold Hands (good bad not evil)
The Red Button - Cruel Girl (she's about to cross my mind)

That's about it. I got tired.

There was a lot of good music that came out this past year. None of it was Fall-Out Boy crap or American Idol alumni or weapon brandishers. I don't know if there was an actual album of the year thing. I guess if pressed I'd have to pick Amy Winehouse, but actually I think it came out in 2006 in the UK. And I think some definite shark-jumping has taken place, because if you go to Amazon, you'll see there's even a "smooth jazz salutes amy winehouse". Assholes.

Here's two from 2007 that people pissed their pants over, but take it from me you should stay away in droves: Neon Bible by Arcade Fire - who needs yet another sucky second rate Talking Heads? Isn't Interpol more than enough? Then there's Rilo Kiley's Under The Blacklight. Every single review says how they were influenced by Fleetwood Mac, like that's a good thing. Guess most people are too young to know that Fleetwood Mac (the LA cokeheads, not the UK blues band) were the devil incarnate back in 1977, peddling their west coast fuzzy adult rock while The Clash, The Buzzcocks & The Ramones couldn't get played on the radio to save their soul. I don't forget easily.

I was watching two incredibly lame shows on HGTV today, and both actually provided me with a kinder, gentler way of saying "your (fill in the blank) is ugly as shit" and now I'll pass that along to you:

TASTE-SPECIFIC

Now tell me you wouldn't be able to use that one about every two minutes! But if that popped up on two shows on the same day, it must already be a widely used cliche. It's just a matter of time before I hear someone at work use it.

Here's hoping your taste-specific life goes well in 2008.