Kids For Sale

(note: the title was going to be Liza marries gay man - again!! but I thought that may be a bit obscure. google peter allen)

I can't take it anymore. Britney Spears. I'd like to hit her, baby, one more time. I realize that by blogging about her I am just as guilty as all the others when it comes to giving her undue press coverage (not that I am press, but you know what I mean). But y'know what? She did not invent the asshole celebrity persona (she did, however, perfect it). Idiot celebrities have been around for ages. It's just that media coverage is so vast nowadays, and info gets passed so quickly, we are kept in the know at all times. We can't hide from this shit! If Marilyn Monroe was around today, we'd probably know much more about her pill-taking escapades. And Judy Garland? Forget about it! And when Jerry Lee Lewis married his 14 year old 2nd cousin the video would be on YouTube! And Elvis had Priscilla living with him & his family in Germany when she was extremely underage! And her family agreed to that! It was like selling her! These are just a few tidbits I offer you.

What happened to the good old days when Michael Jackson used to carry Webster around like a pet chimp, then traded him in for a real pet chimp! Or when Alice Cooper wore Tammy Faye Baker makeup and wore a live snake boa! And what about bra burning and murdering b-movie starlets? (what - they still do that?)

These are desperate times. Divine eating dogshit is no longer an outrageous spectacle. Nowadays you have to drink the urine, too. And do it at the MTV Video Music Awards, of course.