! ! ! ? ! ? ? ! ! ! !!!!!!!!!!!!

I love exclamation points! They make a common statement into something of world import! Just look at the following example:

Bless me father for I have sinned.

now:

Bless me father for I have sinned!

And when you add italics & boldness, it really sings:

Bless me father for I have sinned !

YEAH!! That's what I'm talkin' about! Who is that speaking? Manson? OJ? Cheney? Bill O'Reilly? Me??? YOW!!!!!

I had noticed while deciding to post another rip-snorter that all of the titles of my June postings so far had exclamation points! As today's teens say, Exclamation points rule!

Now on the other side of the coin, there are so many people I come in contact with that talk in what I call upspeak. I don't know what the actual term for this is, maybe "non-committal class-based arrogance", but I think it was perpetrated by the media. It's probably been around forever, but I seem to remember it taking a very noticeable place in the queue of life back in the '80s, so we'll blame it on Thirtysomething.

I have a co-worker that is an incessant upspeaker. It goes a little something like this:

"I'll be right back? I'm going to the ladies room?"

Bitch, how the f%*k do I know?

When it's used in making a point, it takes on a very real "you're kinda stupid? so I'll tell you this in a non-threatening tone? and maybe it will seep into your 'I-don't-use-a-pda' psyche?"

dig:

"This needs to be reviewed for errors? Because Mr. Jones has an important meeting in an hour?"

it's like explaining to a child: "blah blah blah blah - oohhhh-kaaaay? and maybe you'll get a cookie, mmm-kaaaay?""

If you realize you're doing this, and now you're catching yourself & your shit is all off & you're cursing me, then my job is done!

Oh yeah, by the way: a word about that photo at the top? Yes, that one? Aren't they special!!!!!!