Double Nickels!

Guess what?! It's my birthday. Yes, I get one around this time every year. I know what you're saying, "Wait, wasn't the last post about this?" Well, yes and no. Hey, it's MY blog, get yer own if the topics aren't to your liking. Shall I go back to Amy Winehouse posts again?

Age-wise I've outlived my father & my two best friends. And other than aches & pains, thinning hair, unflattering silhouettes, ear hair, chin/neck melding and contempt for youthkind it's like I'm still 21.

What is age? Ice, Bronze, Stone? Aqaurius? Well mine has reached twin-digits. That's n0t the same as double digits, which I've been since I was 10. But now let's see if you can guess my age:

22? (oh my and-uh a-boo hoo)

66? (getting my kicks)

77? (stripping at sunset)

That's right, I'm ageless! Actually, on the day I was born Sir Edmund Hillary became the first man to scale Mount Everest! (look it up) No wonder I'm tired!

Some other things of import: the first Coca Cola ad in the Atlanta Journal; Stravinsky's The Rites Of Spring premieres in Paris; Einstein tests the theory of relativity; White Christmas is recorded.

Fellow birthers: Bob Hope; JFK; Stacy Keach; Blair from Fats Of Life; Rupert Everett; LaToya Jackson; Rebbie Jackson; John Hinckley Jr; Annette Benning; Noel Gallagher; Danny Elfman; Pelle Almqvist (The Hives); Gary Brooker (Procol harum); Melissa Etheridge.

Deathers: Mary Pickford; Romy Schneider; John Cipollina (guitar wizard from Quicksilver Messenger Service); Jeff Buckley; Barry Goldwater; Fanny Brice; John Barrymore.

Regrets, I've had a few - million. Have a seat and I'll recite every last one of 'em if you like. At least those I can remember.

I've had some memorable gifts. The year I turned 11 I got a brand new 3-speed bike. It was electric blue. In 1966 (the year garage broke) I got the debut album by The Shadows Of Knight. And you already know about the microphone & the 1st Ramones album. When I was 18 my brother-in-law gave me his old Ford Fairlane, it was boss but I didn't know how to take care of it. The year I turned 21 I got Bowie's Diamond Dogs & a surprise birthday-cum-engagement party. I still have the album. But the banquet hall has long been torn down. And on my 30th birthday my best friend Tom gave me a Numark mixing console that I used for years of DJ work. I actually just hooked it up again to my home setup. Swingin' Time!

In recent years my daughter (who has a hee-larious blog here http://www.amandawantsahugnkiss.blogspot.com/ ) has been taking me to our local concert venues for a night of boozin' & boppin'. We've seen Coldplay while they were still on the upswing, Manic Street Preachers in their 5 minutes of credibility, and last year she got me a brand spankin' new PC, so I can download all the illegal music imaginable!

Nowadays when people ask me what I want for my birthday, I honestly don't want anything. Yeah, I used to think that was bullshit, but nowadays I just buy whatever I want. It gets like that when you're older. What I really want is to play some cards, have a few drinks, a few smokes, and a few laughs. That would be the best birthday gift. Well, that, and maybe have Kim Cattrall sit naked on my lap.

And for those of you out there who I haven't acknowledged, accept my apologies. I'm old and forgetful and my diaper needs changing.